my boy

The other night I had one of those nights when my brain woudn't turn off. It had been one of those really great days with Liam that was full of sweet moments that I always want to remember. I thought about the great things that we did that day and these past 16 months that we have had together. Then my mind started to play the movie of his future life. Dropping him off at Kindergarten, sitting around the kichen table helping him with homework, having his friends come over in high school, settling him into his new dorm room, saying goodbye to him at the airport for his mission and that's when it hit. It hit me hard. Obviously it's far down the road and I want all of those great things for him, but it hit me that one day I was going to have to say goodbye to him. That just kills. I'm the one that knows his every grunt and word. I'm the one that wipes his nose, kisses and hugs him when he bumps his head, thinks of his every need 24/7. He gives me hugs and kisses whenver I want. He wants to be right by me. He laughs at my jokes and one day that will all stop. It was just like that scene in Father of the Bride where Steve Martin was playing back in his mind his daughter's life the night before her wedding.

I look forward to all of those huge moments in his life and all the other ones too, but I can definitely wait. I want to make sure that each day he knows just how much I love him so he'll always want to come back home to his Mama.